Ironwing Icarus

Beastly and the Beast

     Beauty and the Beast is a wonderful story. A beautiful girl learns to see past herself to see the inner beauty of another. Very Poetic. Then she kisses him and he becomes a handsome prince. I think Shrek is more poetic, though. A beautiful woman falls in love with an Ogre, then turns into an ugly ogre. I mean our world is full of ugly people, loved by God. I think life might seem more beautiful if we raised our children on stories that would teach them that love creates beauty, not the other way around. Would you still like the story if it was Beastly and the other equally Beastly Beast? My thoughts on the damage done to beauty.

     These past few days I’ve been reading posts. Lots of posts. Almost all by girls who have struggled with their self-image, and a heart-wrenching amount of pains that come with it. I’ve been thinking a lot about some cultural ideas of beauty. I have some things to say. I fear, as I usually do when I write, that you won’t find my words beautiful or elegant. That they won’t cut your heart, the way they seem to bleed from mine…but the apostles relied on the Lord to make the word of His grace known, so I think I simply have to do the same. Write some ugly words, and trust their beauty is in their substance not their form. Truth has inherent poetry written into it’s being, but I am getting away from the subject at hand.

     It doesn’t take a lot of time in church before you hear an attack on the cultural, worldly view of beauty. We then tell the girls that they are beautiful, no matter what they look like, and move on. But it strikes me, perhaps because no one has ever expected me to be pretty, that we have not dealt with the wound caused by sin. We have not taught the people that beauty can be idolized, and need not be chased. When we chase beauty we merely catch the wind. Beauty always exists in substance, not in form. Humans are beautiful, because they are human. The church embraces that, but people like me have thus far failed to live it. Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m not trying to condemn girls for wanting to feel beautiful. I’m writing to men. See, most girls don’t actually want to feel beautiful they want to feel lovable, but men can’t seem to love something that they don’t think is beautiful. Thus, beauty equals love.

     So then, if we truly wanted to change the hearts of the church, it would start in what we value. I hear constantly from my brothers in Christ that they want to marry a beautiful girl who loves Jesus. I’ve said myself, “I’m going to marry a righteous babe.” Well that seems like a selfish desire. Me saying to the Lord of hosts, “Give me someone who loves you, but make her pretty.” I might as well also say, “Take me to do work among the poorest of the poor, but give me a BMW so I can do it comfortably.” If us men want to allow our sisters to truly feel the value that courses through their veins. If we want them to know, to know beyond knowing, that God created them how He did on purpose…It doesn’t start in fixing them. It starts in fixing us. I’m calling for men to forsake their idolatry of female beauty. I’m calling for men to no longer be superficial. I’m calling for us to decisively get to know the hearts of those around us. I’m calling for men to cease worshiping at the alter of lust.

      Do you realize that that is what this is? It’s lust. Our culture has thrown sexuality at us with such fury and fire that we think we can only lust after a women’s breasts and not her eyes. My lust for beauty has destroyed my sisters. Let me see with Jesus’ eyes. You know, I have several people in my life that when I met them I thought they were rather plain. Their personalities rather boring. In getting to know them, they have become fantastic. The kind of people boys like me write novels about. They have souls that Jesus bleed for, and sins that He has cried over. They have hairs that he has counted, and hearts that he has regulated. He gives them breath. He does this because He loves them. He loves them because they are His children…And He who loves the Father, loves the child born  of Him (1 John 5:1). I mean, I’ve seeing in my own soul a difficulty I’ve encountered in being friends with someone who I find unattractive. That is because I’ve trained myself to only seek to know the attractive. No more. Let us seek to know, intimately, every man, woman and child who loves Jesus. Let us listen to people as if they are good books. Let us dig deep in the soils of the human soul to find the treasure that God has designed into them to reflect His own magnificence.

      My roommate Tripp gets depressed because people he loves don’t know Jesus. Tripp is like a Tiny lumberjack, full of kindness and syrup. He explodes with joy when he sees me, shouting, “Roommate!” He is serious about living for Christ, and feels hurt when other Christians don’t live for Him too. Tripp has struggled with judging homosexuals, but I’ve watched him talk with a man dressed as a woman for a long time. His body language, his stories and his tolerance shouting: “YOU ARE LOVABLE!” I see Jesus in Tripp. Tripp is pretty ugly, though. Girls don’t think so. Girls think he is cute…but when you think about it. He is a sinner. Full of earth and dirt, but saved by grace. It’s Jesus in Tripp that I think is magnificent. Maybe That’s the point.

     My friend Jared is the closest thing to a human teddy bear I’ve ever encountered. He is like cool water in the desert. He gives the most fantastic hugs, that could tell anyone they are loved. He hugs me a lot. It’s more than that, though. When I’m with him, I don’t feel like I need to impress anyone. We argue a lot sometimes, but I never feel like he dislikes me. He is the kind of person who truly gets to know people. Maybe that makes him an expert at showing love. He thinks the simplest things about people are beautiful. He feels their pain. Jared is rather overweight, and while he would never say it, you can tell the ways he feels shame when he is forced to mention it. The thing is, I can’t name a single person who thinks of Jared as overweight. The reason is that if you know Jared, you know his love. So when you think of Jared you think of his kind eyes, or his fantastic smile. You think of his enthusiasm, or his encouragement. You think of his passion. What he looks like never even seems to cross your mind. That’s because you can see Jesus in Jared, and Jesus is magnificent.

     My friend Michaela is the smallest package of sunshine I’ve ever met. I’ve asked her to go on a walk and we’ve ended up hiking a mountain, at night. She is hysterically funny, if you take the time to listen. She isn’t sure what she wants to be when she grows up (I’d tell her she isn’t going to grow anymore, but she wouldn’t believe me), but knows she wants to help people. So she is studying behavioral health, and thinking about counseling and social work. She has had a lot of struggles, and is a little burnt out on the church. Nonetheless, God is her strength. She loves him, and loves spending time with his people. It’s Jesus in her that shines through, and He is magnificent.

     My friend Chesney is probably a fairy tale character misplaced. Somehow she’s made it more than 20 years without losing her child-like innocence, and it translates to a child-like faith. I don’t know anyone who encourages me so consistently to live for Christ. It’s natural. She wants to go to China and take care of Orphans. She wants to show people Christ’s love here too. I posted, “Take me where love is needed,” and she replied, “Love is needed all around you now, Cole.” See when I think of Chesney, I don’t think of whether or not she is beautiful, I think of Jesus. When I think of Tripp, Jared, and Michaela…I think of Jesus.

     Did we forget that in Christ there is no one beautiful and no one ugly, simply Christ in all? Men, I am demanding that we live differently. Did we forget that love is needed all around us now. The sort of love that says I want to be right here, with you, no where else. What if we surrender our rights to marry pretty girls? What if the only thing we looked for in a wife was an unparallelled amount of Jesus shining through? If I a marry a women as homely as a mud fence, let me see Jesus in her face every day. If I did, no woman would ever have a beauty to parallel hers. Can we, as the church, lay to rest the idea that physical beauty is somehow important? Can we see beauty in substance not form? If we don’t feel beautiful can we realize that it’s because we are not? We are normal people, who look normal. We are not ugly people. We are not skinny people. We are not fat people. We are simply people. Beauty is a myth created by blind eyes that do not grasp the magnificence of God woven into the fabric of existence. Let us do our best to see with the eyes of Jesus.

     If this could happen, then girls would not need to feel beautiful. They would realize they are lovable, created to be like God. They could see themselves realistically, with bodies marred by sin that will be made perfect one day. What would matter would no longer be the transient idea of feeling beautiful. If we are the ones who have made beauty important, than we are free to rewrite what it means to be beautiful. May I suggest a new definition? BEAUTY IS TO BE LIKE JESUS. All that would remain is Jesus. If we asked them are you beautiful, they could respond Jesus IS and He is in me.

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